Outer join on two tables with sequential guid stalls - sql-server

Question

I'm attempting to perform a full outer join on two tables that are not related. Each table has a location_id which will eventually form the primary/foreign key relationship (once I figure out this performance issue). When executing the outer join, it just clocks away. Queries and triggers performed against each table on its own complete in less than a second.
This table has 21000 records:
CREATE TABLE [dbo].[TBL_LOCATIONS](
[OBJECTID] [int] NOT NULL,
[Loc_Name] [nvarchar](100) NULL,
[Location_ID] [uniqueidentifier] NULL,
[SHAPE] [geometry] NULL,
CONSTRAINT [R33_pk] PRIMARY KEY CLUSTERED
(
[OBJECTID] ASC
)WITH (PAD_INDEX = OFF, STATISTICS_NORECOMPUTE = OFF, IGNORE_DUP_KEY = OFF, ALLOW_ROW_LOCKS = ON, ALLOW_PAGE_LOCKS = ON, FILLFACTOR = 75) ON [PRIMARY]
) ON [PRIMARY]
GO
ALTER TABLE [dbo].[TBL_LOCATIONS] WITH CHECK ADD CONSTRAINT [g17_ck] CHECK (([SHAPE].[STSrid]=(26917)))
GO
ALTER TABLE [dbo].[TBL_LOCATIONS] ADD CONSTRAINT [DF_TBL_LOCATIONS_Location_ID] DEFAULT (newsequentialid()) FOR [Location_ID]
GO
CREATE SPATIAL INDEX [S17_idx] ON [dbo].[TBL_LOCATIONS]
(
[SHAPE]
)USING GEOMETRY_GRID
WITH (
BOUNDING_BOX =(224827, 3923750, 323464, 3967780), GRIDS =(LEVEL_1 = HIGH,LEVEL_2 = HIGH,LEVEL_3 = HIGH,LEVEL_4 = HIGH),
CELLS_PER_OBJECT = 16, PAD_INDEX = OFF, SORT_IN_TEMPDB = OFF, DROP_EXISTING = OFF, ALLOW_ROW_LOCKS = ON, ALLOW_PAGE_LOCKS = ON) ON [PRIMARY]
GO
CREATE UNIQUE NONCLUSTERED INDEX [UUID_OID_33] ON [dbo].[TBL_LOCATIONS]
(
[Location_ID] ASC,
[OBJECTID] ASC
)WITH (PAD_INDEX = OFF, STATISTICS_NORECOMPUTE = OFF, SORT_IN_TEMPDB = OFF, IGNORE_DUP_KEY = OFF, DROP_EXISTING = OFF, ONLINE = OFF, ALLOW_ROW_LOCKS = ON, ALLOW_PAGE_LOCKS = ON, FILLFACTOR = 75) ON [PRIMARY]
GO
This table has 53000 records
CREATE TABLE [dbo].[TBL_EVENTS](
[OBJECTID] [int] NOT NULL,
[Event_ID] [uniqueidentifier] NULL,
[Location_ID] [uniqueidentifier] NULL,
CONSTRAINT [PK_TBL_EVENTS] PRIMARY KEY CLUSTERED
(
[OBJECTID] ASC
)WITH (PAD_INDEX = OFF, STATISTICS_NORECOMPUTE = OFF, IGNORE_DUP_KEY = OFF, ALLOW_ROW_LOCKS = ON, ALLOW_PAGE_LOCKS = ON) ON [PRIMARY]
) ON [PRIMARY]
GO
ALTER TABLE [dbo].[TBL_EVENTS] ADD CONSTRAINT [DF_TBL_EVENTS_Event_ID] DEFAULT (newsequentialid()) FOR [Event_ID]
GO
ALTER TABLE [dbo].[TBL_EVENTS] ADD CONSTRAINT [DF_TBL_EVENTS_Event_ID] DEFAULT (newsequentialid()) FOR [Event_ID]
GO
CREATE UNIQUE NONCLUSTERED INDEX [R36_SDE_ROWID_UK] ON [dbo].[TBL_EVENTS]
(
[OBJECTID] ASC
)WITH (PAD_INDEX = OFF, STATISTICS_NORECOMPUTE = OFF, SORT_IN_TEMPDB = OFF, IGNORE_DUP_KEY = OFF, DROP_EXISTING = OFF, ONLINE = OFF, ALLOW_ROW_LOCKS = ON, ALLOW_PAGE_LOCKS = ON, FILLFACTOR = 75) ON [PRIMARY]
GO
And here is the query that is running....and running...1 hour and no results.
SELECT
TBL_LOCATIONS.Loc_Name,
TBL_LOCATIONS.Location_ID,
TBL_LOCATIONS.SHAPE,
TBL_EVENTS.Event_ID
FROM
TBL_EVENTS
FULL OUTER JOIN
TBL_LOCATIONS ON TBL_EVENTS.Location_ID = TBL_LOCATIONS.Location_ID
I've tried every permutation of attribute indexes on both tables, rebuilding and reorganizing them, nothing affects the performance. The use of ObjectID as PK is mandated by the application, as is the sequentialGUID. I don't think those are factors here, as both these tables perform splendidly outside of this query. SQL Server 2008 SP1 64BIT on RAID 10/48 GB RAM.

Answer 1

FULL JOIN works well when data in columns used to links tables are unique.
For rows containing duplicated data FULL JOIN behaves like CROSS JOIN and can cause performace issues.
So probably bottleneck comes from duplicates in LOCATION_ID column.

Answer 2

Maybe you need to consider turning off Transaction Logging whilst doing all that.

Answer 3

If the linked field values are not all that unique (location), the query size could approach quite a large number.
In an extreme example, if location only had the value of "1" in both tables, the total rows would be close to the cross join size, about 1,113,000,000 rows (21,000 * 53,000). A query of this size (over a billion rows) will take a long time to run.
EDIT - updating incorrect statement as pointed out in comments